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(Transcribed by TurboScribe. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) This is a special episode of the Feathermane

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Soul Wisdom Show, specifically for Pride.

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And if you are a part of my

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NeuroDivergent community, and if you are also anywhere

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on the LGBTQIA2 plus spectrum, then this episode

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is for you.

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Especially if you don't feel like you are

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part of Pride or part of a community.

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And I just want to tell you that

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I'm going to dive right in because this

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episode is full of a very important message

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of love and caring and support just for

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you.

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You're listening to Feathermane Soul Wisdom, a podcast

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for those looking to rediscover their wild spirit

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in spite of life's challenges.

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If you're living with a chronic illness or

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NeuroDivergent or consider yourself disabled, and you're looking

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to connect with your own inner untamed essence,

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then this show is for you.

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Your host is Kit Kaelstow, Wild Spirit Storyteller.

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Thanks for listening.

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And now on to the episode.

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Hello and welcome.

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I'm Kit Kaelstow, your host.

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So it is June 2026, which means it

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is Pride Month.

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And this is a month where the queer

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community gets to celebrate our unique individuality, our

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relentless existence, our joy, and our essential being.

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And also reflect on the challenges that we're

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facing, as well as the ways in which

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we're building and reaching out to community.

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But if you are NeuroDivergent, there is a

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good chance that you have always had a

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difficult relationship with community or social groups, especially

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if you're Autistic or AUDHD.

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There are a lot of variables in being

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in a group.

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And one of the things that I've realized

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this Pride Month, and it really was sparked

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by something I read, I'll quote it for

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you here shortly, was that as much as

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I know that I am non-binary, genderqueer,

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as much as I know my gender identity,

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I really don't feel like I'm a part

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of the Pride celebrations, because I don't feel

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like I'm a part of community.

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And there's a lot of reasons for that.

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Some of them are baked into my own

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trauma, my complex PTSD, rejection-sensitive dysphoria.

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But some of them are also just kind

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of baked into how society treats NeuroDivergent individuals.

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And all of this kind of got me

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to thinking about my grief coaching specialization.

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And as I've been really kind of making

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the connections between the grief that we experience

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as NeuroDivergent individuals, the grief that I experience

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or my author community experiences, grief in the

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queer community, the trans community especially, that there

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are just a lot of dots to connect

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here.

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So that's kind of what I wanted to

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talk about in today's special Pride episode.

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So what I read that kind of sparked

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me on this was in a yoga newsletter

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I receive.

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And it came from a yoga organization that

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says a lot of good things about being

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inclusive, but yet feels really much built for

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a certain body type, a certain neuro type,

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a certain physical ability type.

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It's like they want to be inclusive in

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some ways and not inclusive in others.

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And what they said was, yoga reminds us

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that our individual well-being is deeply connected

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to the well-being of our communities.

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As we move through Pride Month, we invite

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you to reflect on the ways your practice

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supports connection, compassion, and belonging, both on and

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off the mat.

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And I sat with that for a while.

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And on one hand, it sounds very good.

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I mean, one of the things that I

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do with yoga is I am very much

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attuned into the energetic bodies, the koshas, with,

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you know, the yoga's mission of yoga is

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a way to know the self through the

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body.

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I'm very much tied into that.

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And so I very much get that if

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the individual people in a community are not

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doing well, then the entire community isn't going

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to do well.

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And then inviting in the ways that your

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practice supports connection, compassion, and belonging, both on

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and off the mat.

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And I thought about this.

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And I'm realizing that there are a lot

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of people this month that are feeling very

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left out, and that are feeling very much

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as if they're not a part of a

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community.

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And this has to do in large part

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with social constructs, with the way people imagine

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that certain genders or certain individuals should look.

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But it also has to do with the

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way that the general neurotypical society treats our

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divergent individuals.

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And so what I want to talk about

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today is how to support yourself when you're

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not feeling like you're a part of a

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community.

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I want to talk about ways in which

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you can find and create your own community.

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But mostly, I also want to talk about

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processing and dealing with the grief that comes

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with feeling like you're not a part of

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a community.

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One of the main reasons why neurodivergent individuals

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struggle to find community is because of rejection

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-sensitive dysphoria.

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And it makes a lot of sense.

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I mean, if you are told for your

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entire life that what you're doing is wrong,

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how you're presenting yourself is wrong, the way

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that you're quote-unquote humaning is wrong, then

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you're going to start feeling an acute ability,

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an acute sensation of rejection, any time you're

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starting to feel excluded.

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And what that leads to is that can

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lead to social anxiety, that can lead to

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people basically self-rejecting themselves or keeping themselves

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out of community situations.

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And because of that, that means that a

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lot of neurodivergent individuals don't feel like they

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are part of a community in general, outside

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of any small online or in-person groups

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that they may be a part of that

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are comprised of primarily neurodivergent folks.

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Now, if you layer on top of that,

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not just the current political climate, the current

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climate of prosecution, and some would say outright

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genocide against transgender individuals, you can also be

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dealing with body dysphoria.

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You can be dealing with a situation where

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due to the community you live in, due

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to the state you live in, in the

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US or in the UK, due to the

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people around you that you either are unable

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to transition or do not feel that it's

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safe to transition, or to even begin exploring

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how you might change your body to better

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align with your gender identity.

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And so you might be a transgender individual

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or a genderqueer individual who would like to

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make changes to your physical presentation.

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And because of where you live, it's not

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safe.

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You don't feel like it's safe.

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You don't feel like you're going to be

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accepted.

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Then that adds an additional layer of grief.

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So I want to pause for a moment

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and state that a lot of what I'm

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speaking about here is coming from my own

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feelings and my own lived experiences.

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I sincerely hope that if you are somebody

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who shares these lived experiences, that what I'm

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saying actually resonates with you.

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But please know that I am not speaking

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for the entire neurodivergent community, and I am

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very much not speaking for the entire queer

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community.

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So how do we deal with those feelings

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of grief?

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The first step would be to acknowledge that

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they're there.

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Grief is not something that if you're thinking

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of healing, like you know, you scrape your

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knee, you put a band-aid on it,

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maybe a little antibiotic ointment, four to five

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days it goes away.

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Two weeks, a month later, it's your knee

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doesn't look like it's ever been scraped.

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That is a level of healing where the

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issue goes away completely.

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It's not an issue ever again.

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Grief, along with many of the other things

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that we deal with, isn't like that.

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It doesn't go away.

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It can lessen over time.

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We can learn to live with it over

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time, and it may always be a part

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of us.

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Now there may be a time where it

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doesn't hurt as bad, where it doesn't feel

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as bad.

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And this is kind of described, there's a

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a cartoon, or cartoon isn't the right word,

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but like a mem or a diagram that

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I've seen go around social media quite a

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bit, that shows a like a marble in

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a jar.

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And when you first experience grief, you experience

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it very acutely.

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It encompasses the whole jar, which would be

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you and your being.

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And eventually as you go on, it's not

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so much that the marble gets smaller, or

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the grief gets smaller, but the jar or

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your container, your body, your experiences, yourself, your

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soul, gets bigger to accommodate the grief.

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And so the grief gets lessened, because basically

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you've learned to deal with it, to companion

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with it.

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You've learned, you've learned to almost befriend it,

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rather than try to shove it away and

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make it this big scary monster.

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It's like the, you know, you're laying in

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bed, and you see a shadow on a

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wall, and you might think, you know, oh

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my god, what is that?

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Or you hear a noise, and you think,

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you know, somewhere else in the house, and

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you're like, oh my gosh, what is that?

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You turn on the light, you realize, oh,

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that's what that shadow was.

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Or you step out to the living room,

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you see that the cats are kind of

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playing, you know, having the zoomies at like

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2 a.m., and you're like, oh, okay,

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that's what the noise is.

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You shed some light on it, you've made

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this, you've made it much smaller in its

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environment, without actually stopping whatever's there.

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You know, you're not moving what's causing the

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shadow, unless it's bothering you.

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Your cats may stop having the zoomies, but

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they'll have the zoomies again, and you'll be

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like, okay, I remember that's the cats having

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zoomies.

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It's the same sort of thing when you're

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dealing with grief.

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So step one is to actually say, hey,

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I'm grieving.

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So in this case, it's pride month.

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It is perfectly acceptable and perfectly okay to

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say, hey, this is pride month.

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I am not feeling celebrated.

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I am not feeling like I am part

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of a community that's being celebrated.

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And that hurts.

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So acknowledging that, putting some sunlight on it,

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putting, you know, some awareness around it.

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The next step is, especially when you're starting

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to deal with rejection sensitive dysphoria, would be

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to actually think about, not so much, I

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don't want to say reality, because what you're

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perceiving is reality.

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But maybe think about that narrative, and how

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what you're seeing and feeling and experiencing, either

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is happening or isn't happening.

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So, you know, it's, it's pride month, I,

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you know, don't don't know how active you

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are in your communities on social media.

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Maybe you're seeing a lot of people post,

268
00:13:19,380 --> 00:13:20,820
you know, different things and getting a lot

269
00:13:20,820 --> 00:13:21,680
of comments.

270
00:13:22,300 --> 00:13:26,080
You post, maybe you're talking about your gender

271
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,860
identity, maybe, maybe you feel cute one day,

272
00:13:28,860 --> 00:13:30,360
and you're sharing a picture and saying, hey,

273
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:31,500
I feel cute today.

274
00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:33,620
And you're not getting the feedback or the

275
00:13:33,620 --> 00:13:34,820
validation you want.

276
00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:37,540
One of the ways to look at that,

277
00:13:37,620 --> 00:13:41,280
for example, is to look at the algorithms

278
00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:45,660
and say, okay, the social media algorithms are

279
00:13:45,660 --> 00:13:47,600
set to promote certain things.

280
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:50,760
Is it possible that people care, but the

281
00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:52,640
algorithm is suppressing my content?

282
00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:54,700
And the answer to that quite often is

283
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:55,060
yes.

284
00:13:56,620 --> 00:13:59,000
So then once you kind of start to

285
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,740
think about that and go, okay, so in

286
00:14:01,740 --> 00:14:04,040
my case, I don't feel like I'm a

287
00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:08,020
part of pride or the community, in part

288
00:14:08,020 --> 00:14:10,360
because I don't feel like I'm a part

289
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:14,400
of community in general, unless it's like these

290
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,340
small little pockets that I have created for

291
00:14:16,340 --> 00:14:17,160
myself on the internet.

292
00:14:19,780 --> 00:14:21,600
It's not related to this.

293
00:14:22,100 --> 00:14:23,500
But you know, I can think of a

294
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:25,200
group that I'm in where I very much

295
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:27,200
feel like I'm on the outside looking in.

296
00:14:27,820 --> 00:14:30,120
And I don't think that that's the case.

297
00:14:30,420 --> 00:14:32,380
I think that I'm a lot more welcomed

298
00:14:32,380 --> 00:14:34,920
and a lot more supported than I am.

299
00:14:35,220 --> 00:14:37,360
But that's just the impression I'm getting.

300
00:14:38,540 --> 00:14:41,240
And honestly, because I haven't spoken up about

301
00:14:41,240 --> 00:14:43,900
that, thank you, rejection sensitive dysphoria.

302
00:14:44,580 --> 00:14:45,780
I don't think there's been a lot of

303
00:14:45,780 --> 00:14:47,360
conversations about that.

304
00:14:47,740 --> 00:14:50,360
But I'm imagining that that's not what is

305
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:50,760
meant.

306
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,200
Obviously, I could probably fix that by speaking

307
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:54,500
up.

308
00:14:55,660 --> 00:15:00,880
I could also fix that by leaving the

309
00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:02,840
group and finding a group where I do

310
00:15:02,840 --> 00:15:05,300
feel welcome and I do feel supported.

311
00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:09,980
And so I know for myself, and this

312
00:15:09,980 --> 00:15:11,380
I would say with step three is to

313
00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:12,580
kind of work through this.

314
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:14,800
Why do you not feel like you're part

315
00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:15,420
of a community?

316
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:18,480
Well, for me, I have not done anything

317
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:20,180
to change my presentation.

318
00:15:21,220 --> 00:15:22,780
Therefore, when a lot of people look at

319
00:15:22,780 --> 00:15:25,640
me, they assume my gender identity aligns with

320
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:27,260
the one that I was assigned at birth.

321
00:15:27,900 --> 00:15:31,680
Because I haven't done anything to try to

322
00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:34,660
change that other than I dress.

323
00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,060
Well, I have no sense of style.

324
00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:40,020
I dress in my comfortable clothes, often masculine

325
00:15:40,020 --> 00:15:40,620
presenting.

326
00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:43,400
And so that's just how I come across.

327
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,340
Which is good.

328
00:15:47,460 --> 00:15:50,400
I mean, because it's masculine presenting, but there's

329
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,340
still parts of my body that mean that

330
00:15:52,340 --> 00:15:53,600
every time I go to the feed store,

331
00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:54,460
I get ma'am.

332
00:15:54,940 --> 00:15:57,060
It's like, you know, and I just say

333
00:15:57,060 --> 00:15:57,440
thank you.

334
00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:59,200
I'm like, whatever, they don't know any better.

335
00:16:01,080 --> 00:16:02,600
I just deal with it.

336
00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:06,820
But I feel like because I have not

337
00:16:06,820 --> 00:16:10,080
as visible in my transition, a lot of

338
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,400
my transition has been how I view myself

339
00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:15,500
internally, how I feel about myself, the love

340
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,380
and care and support I give myself.

341
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,320
That's not externally visible.

342
00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:22,900
Therefore, I don't feel like I am a

343
00:16:22,900 --> 00:16:24,960
part of the trans community, even though as

344
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:28,380
a non-binary genderqueer person, I very much

345
00:16:28,380 --> 00:16:28,740
am.

346
00:16:29,660 --> 00:16:32,640
And I very much could encounter the issues

347
00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:36,460
that my community deals with as far as

348
00:16:36,460 --> 00:16:38,820
using public restrooms and that sort of thing.

349
00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:41,860
Because in many ways, I am gender non

350
00:16:41,860 --> 00:16:42,360
-conforming.

351
00:16:45,740 --> 00:16:49,780
The thinking about it, I want to caution

352
00:16:49,780 --> 00:16:52,680
you not to assume that the problem is

353
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:53,140
with you.

354
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:57,060
And I feel like I'm probably going to

355
00:16:57,060 --> 00:16:58,400
have to do a part two of this,

356
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:02,800
because I could, I need to talk about

357
00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:06,180
how the community at large, and I don't

358
00:17:06,180 --> 00:17:08,700
care if this is the queer community, the

359
00:17:08,700 --> 00:17:14,000
writing community, basically the neurotypical people need to

360
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:19,240
do better with accepting and supporting and accommodating

361
00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:21,040
the neurodivergent people around them.

362
00:17:21,839 --> 00:17:25,680
And that's where the neurodivergent grief kind of

363
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:31,980
collides with the grief of of being queer

364
00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:32,720
at the moment.

365
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:36,460
Like grief is one of those things that

366
00:17:36,460 --> 00:17:38,100
the more I think about it, and the

367
00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:40,880
more I start connecting dots, it does not

368
00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:42,440
fall into neat little silos.

369
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:48,120
For example, on Pet Grief Pathfinder, because I

370
00:17:48,120 --> 00:17:51,520
started my journey being certified in pet loss

371
00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:52,420
grief support.

372
00:17:53,220 --> 00:17:56,160
And I just want to say, if you

373
00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:58,300
have lost a pet and you're struggling with

374
00:17:58,300 --> 00:18:01,020
the grief, I do encourage you to go

375
00:18:01,020 --> 00:18:03,180
to Pet Grief Pathfinder.com.

376
00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,780
You can book a free call with me.

377
00:18:06,120 --> 00:18:08,400
There are monthly grief circles you can join.

378
00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:10,300
I have a newsletter.

379
00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,240
You know, there's support for you there.

380
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:17,320
My grief journey began there, but I very

381
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,900
quickly realized, I mean, even just like one

382
00:18:19,900 --> 00:18:23,060
or two classes into my certification, I very

383
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:26,720
quickly realized that the other communities that I'm

384
00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,960
a member of, being a published author, being

385
00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:33,260
neurodivergent, being queer, being disabled, that there's grief

386
00:18:33,260 --> 00:18:36,360
inherent and grief that happens in those communities

387
00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,300
as well.

388
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:39,560
And a lot of it overlaps.

389
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:41,920
It doesn't, there's no, you know, it's not

390
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,620
like the grocery store where you have the

391
00:18:43,620 --> 00:18:46,160
dairy case, and then you have the frozen

392
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:47,160
food section.

393
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,940
And the frozen food section is all, you

394
00:18:49,940 --> 00:18:51,560
know, okay, here's your ice cream, here's your

395
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:53,700
frozen pizzas, here's your french fries.

396
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,260
It's not all nice and neat like that

397
00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:57,720
when you come to grief.

398
00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:00,380
Grief overlaps.

399
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,080
Grief pulls on all of our life experiences.

400
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:08,840
And so this Pride Month, you know, I'm

401
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:11,620
talking about not feeling like being part of

402
00:19:11,620 --> 00:19:14,280
the queer community, but it comes from a

403
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:15,200
lot of other places.

404
00:19:16,140 --> 00:19:20,900
And so as a neurodivergent individual, I often

405
00:19:20,900 --> 00:19:25,020
feel like, even though I may be like

406
00:19:25,020 --> 00:19:27,980
in a workplace, my reviews may say exceeds

407
00:19:27,980 --> 00:19:33,200
expectations every single year, I don't feel like

408
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:34,960
a welcomed or a good member of that

409
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:39,500
community, because my neurodivergent brain does not fit

410
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:41,680
in and operate the way the neurotypical brains

411
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,080
work in that space.

412
00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:45,540
And I think that happens a lot in

413
00:19:45,540 --> 00:19:47,180
the queer spaces as well.

414
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:51,080
Because, and again, some of this is cultural,

415
00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:54,980
some of this is society, but there seems

416
00:19:54,980 --> 00:19:59,240
to be a focus on very specific groups

417
00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:03,420
of queer individuals and very specific presentations of

418
00:20:03,420 --> 00:20:04,200
those individuals.

419
00:20:05,060 --> 00:20:08,980
And so what happens is, while there is

420
00:20:08,980 --> 00:20:15,680
a huge overlap between neurodivergence and between being

421
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:19,780
queer, you know, again, across the whole LGBTQIA2

422
00:20:19,780 --> 00:20:24,440
spirit plus spectrum, there's a big overlap there.

423
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:28,480
And so if you're in a community that

424
00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:33,740
that is often forgotten by kind of the

425
00:20:33,740 --> 00:20:37,660
the grand narrative that is presented by what

426
00:20:37,660 --> 00:20:40,880
you see on in media, maybe the loudest

427
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:44,100
voices on social media, if you're part of

428
00:20:44,100 --> 00:20:46,480
a community, if you're if you're on that

429
00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:50,940
spectrum, that is not well represented, you can

430
00:20:50,940 --> 00:20:51,880
feel left out.

431
00:20:53,340 --> 00:20:57,940
And so I think it's important to acknowledge

432
00:20:57,940 --> 00:21:01,020
the way that all of our identities interact

433
00:21:01,020 --> 00:21:04,640
with each other, intersect with each other, and

434
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:05,800
influence one another.

435
00:21:06,940 --> 00:21:11,100
And I think it's important to think about

436
00:21:11,100 --> 00:21:13,680
how the grief that we may be feeling,

437
00:21:14,060 --> 00:21:16,480
and not just this month, but any month

438
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:18,520
out of the year, how the grief that

439
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:21,000
we may be feeling arises out of the

440
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:24,400
intersections of those identities, the way that those

441
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:26,460
identities have been shaped.

442
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:30,800
Because the truth is, a lot of the

443
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:34,980
things that I feel in the about not

444
00:21:34,980 --> 00:21:37,480
being a part of the queer community, I

445
00:21:37,480 --> 00:21:42,200
also feel in the neurodivergent community, which is,

446
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:45,560
you know, kind of earth shaking a little

447
00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:46,620
bit to think about.

448
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:53,560
Because while I am not, well, let me

449
00:21:53,560 --> 00:21:54,320
back up a bit.

450
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:58,620
While I am very good at masking and

451
00:21:58,620 --> 00:22:03,040
presenting on my gender identity, and yes, that

452
00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:04,040
is a form of masking.

453
00:22:06,060 --> 00:22:10,000
Um, where, as I've gotten older, and as

454
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,260
I have entered in different stages of my

455
00:22:12,260 --> 00:22:17,480
life, it is no joke that if you

456
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:21,100
are in perimenopause, you're it gets harder and

457
00:22:21,100 --> 00:22:23,780
harder and harder to mask your neurodivergence.

458
00:22:24,540 --> 00:22:25,640
And some of that has to do with

459
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:25,960
burnout.

460
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:27,340
Some of that has to do with the

461
00:22:27,340 --> 00:22:29,400
fact that, you know, you reach a certain

462
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:32,400
age, and you just don't care anymore.

463
00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:35,360
You know, masking and fitting in just isn't

464
00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:37,580
as important as it used to be in

465
00:22:37,580 --> 00:22:38,880
certain contexts.

466
00:22:40,220 --> 00:22:46,540
But I have noticed that the ways that

467
00:22:46,540 --> 00:22:50,180
I don't feel don't fit into feel like

468
00:22:50,180 --> 00:22:52,880
I don't fit into the neurodivergent community is

469
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:54,840
also ways that I don't feel like I

470
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:56,020
fit into the queer community.

471
00:22:56,020 --> 00:22:58,400
And that comes down to gender dysphoria.

472
00:23:01,020 --> 00:23:06,360
That comes down to how I feel in

473
00:23:06,360 --> 00:23:08,860
my body, the messages that I've taken in,

474
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:12,360
and how I'm working to work with those

475
00:23:12,360 --> 00:23:16,680
messages, to do the wild spirit storytelling, and

476
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,100
the work that I do with wild spirit

477
00:23:18,100 --> 00:23:21,080
storytelling, and the work that I do with

478
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:22,840
grief with the grief pathfinder.

479
00:23:24,540 --> 00:23:29,240
Because that if there's one thing that ties

480
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,560
together my grief this month, it's the dysphoria.

481
00:23:32,940 --> 00:23:37,060
It's that I don't look like somebody who

482
00:23:37,060 --> 00:23:38,620
gets attention on online.

483
00:23:40,360 --> 00:23:45,260
I don't look like somebody who matches my

484
00:23:45,260 --> 00:23:47,440
gender identity, and I don't believe I ever

485
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:48,140
will.

486
00:23:49,380 --> 00:23:51,680
Um, for many reasons.

487
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:58,660
And so because of that, this month has

488
00:23:58,660 --> 00:23:59,520
been very difficult.

489
00:24:00,740 --> 00:24:03,980
And I got a little more personal in

490
00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,780
this episode than I think I thought I

491
00:24:05,780 --> 00:24:06,640
was going to.

492
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:09,120
But I'm also sharing again in the hopes

493
00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:11,460
that you are not, you know, that if

494
00:24:11,460 --> 00:24:12,980
you're listening to this and you're resonating with

495
00:24:12,980 --> 00:24:13,980
this, that you're not alone.

496
00:24:14,340 --> 00:24:16,280
I said in the opening that this was

497
00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:17,760
going to be a big old message of

498
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:18,880
love and support for you.

499
00:24:18,980 --> 00:24:21,440
And I feel like what I have said

500
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,220
maybe has not been.

501
00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:27,060
But where I want to go with this

502
00:24:27,060 --> 00:24:31,720
is that when we acknowledge the grief, when

503
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,360
we kind of dig under the surface and

504
00:24:34,360 --> 00:24:36,420
find out what's causing the grief, we keep

505
00:24:36,420 --> 00:24:38,660
asking that existential question, why?

506
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:43,560
What we can do is instead of meeting

507
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:49,200
that grief with recriminations, with feeling bad, with

508
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,260
feeling like we missed something, feeling like we

509
00:24:51,260 --> 00:24:54,880
should do something better, we can actually meet

510
00:24:54,880 --> 00:25:04,120
that grief with absolutely radical, absolutely enthusiastic, absolutely

511
00:25:04,120 --> 00:25:07,360
ecstatic self-acceptance.

512
00:25:09,300 --> 00:25:10,260
Radical acceptance.

513
00:25:11,380 --> 00:25:13,060
Note I didn't say love.

514
00:25:13,420 --> 00:25:14,960
If you can meet all of that with

515
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:18,740
self-love, that is amazing and wonderful and

516
00:25:18,740 --> 00:25:19,920
I'm so happy for you.

517
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:22,220
But I don't want you to feel like

518
00:25:22,220 --> 00:25:23,660
that if you're not at the point yet

519
00:25:23,660 --> 00:25:25,480
where you can meet that with self-love,

520
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:27,520
that you can at least meet that with

521
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:29,900
self-acceptance, radical acceptance.

522
00:25:30,860 --> 00:25:34,620
And radical acceptance is not giving up.

523
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:41,900
Radical acceptance is not accepting the status quo.

524
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:48,110
It is saying, you know what, this sucks

525
00:25:48,110 --> 00:25:48,590
right now.

526
00:25:48,690 --> 00:25:50,150
This is what I'm feeling right now.

527
00:25:50,250 --> 00:25:51,770
This is what I'm dealing with right now.

528
00:25:52,710 --> 00:25:55,330
And it's okay not to be okay.

529
00:25:56,230 --> 00:25:57,630
And I know that's kind of a cliched

530
00:25:57,630 --> 00:26:00,950
statement, but it's also a good starting point.

531
00:26:01,670 --> 00:26:04,770
When you're dealing with grief, to say it's

532
00:26:04,770 --> 00:26:08,930
okay that you're not okay allows you to

533
00:26:08,930 --> 00:26:13,230
feel your grief, whatever form that takes.

534
00:26:13,430 --> 00:26:16,450
If you're breaking down in tears, if you

535
00:26:16,450 --> 00:26:18,810
want to scream into a pillow, if you

536
00:26:18,810 --> 00:26:20,390
can go to a remote area and just

537
00:26:20,390 --> 00:26:22,610
scream your frustrations into the woods, that's even

538
00:26:22,610 --> 00:26:23,050
better.

539
00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:25,850
I've been known to do that since I

540
00:26:25,850 --> 00:26:27,950
live very remotely and it is very helpful.

541
00:26:28,250 --> 00:26:31,710
So I highly recommend screaming into the woods

542
00:26:31,710 --> 00:26:33,830
if nobody's around to get concerned.

543
00:26:35,310 --> 00:26:38,610
Screaming into a pillow, you know, giving squishy

544
00:26:38,610 --> 00:26:42,170
hugs to your cat or your dog, crying,

545
00:26:42,590 --> 00:26:46,690
however you can express what you need in

546
00:26:46,690 --> 00:26:47,370
that moment.

547
00:26:47,670 --> 00:26:50,710
I encourage you to to find out what

548
00:26:50,710 --> 00:26:52,430
you need and to express that.

549
00:26:55,260 --> 00:27:00,020
Self-acceptance just says, hey, it's okay that

550
00:27:00,020 --> 00:27:00,860
I'm not okay.

551
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:04,600
It's okay that I am feeling these things.

552
00:27:05,820 --> 00:27:09,760
And if you can, self-acceptance is saying,

553
00:27:10,100 --> 00:27:11,780
I am here for myself.

554
00:27:11,780 --> 00:27:15,440
I'm going to support myself through this and

555
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:16,800
I will get through this.

556
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:20,160
It may not feel good.

557
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:22,560
It may suck.

558
00:27:22,660 --> 00:27:24,420
As the meme says, this may pass like

559
00:27:24,420 --> 00:27:26,260
a kidney stone, but it will pass.

560
00:27:26,260 --> 00:27:30,400
But that self-acceptance that you are loved,

561
00:27:30,420 --> 00:27:36,100
you are not alone to yourself is super

562
00:27:36,100 --> 00:27:36,580
powerful.

563
00:27:37,540 --> 00:27:40,440
And that's the message that I guess I

564
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:42,300
want to leave everybody with today.

565
00:27:43,460 --> 00:27:44,800
You are not alone.

566
00:27:45,740 --> 00:27:47,060
You are amazing.

567
00:27:47,180 --> 00:27:48,500
I know you may not feel it right

568
00:27:48,500 --> 00:27:48,720
now.

569
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:50,560
If you're dealing with the grief of pride,

570
00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:52,800
you may feel like you don't belong.

571
00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:55,440
You may feel like you're isolated and alone.

572
00:27:55,700 --> 00:27:57,080
You are not alone.

573
00:27:57,860 --> 00:27:58,960
You are amazing.

574
00:28:00,180 --> 00:28:01,420
It is okay to grieve.

575
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:03,840
It is very human to grieve.

576
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:06,720
It is very natural to grieve.

577
00:28:06,860 --> 00:28:08,800
And I say that in the sense of

578
00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:10,440
nature and the wider world.

579
00:28:11,140 --> 00:28:12,300
Animals grieve.

580
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:15,580
It is okay.

581
00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:20,240
And once you acknowledge that, and once you

582
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,640
acknowledge those emotions, I feel like doors are

583
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:24,420
going to open.

584
00:28:25,340 --> 00:28:27,100
So I'm going to make a note next

585
00:28:27,100 --> 00:28:27,340
week.

586
00:28:27,420 --> 00:28:30,360
I'm going to talk about what the community

587
00:28:30,360 --> 00:28:32,800
can do to support us.

588
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,220
The neurodivergent community.

589
00:28:35,420 --> 00:28:38,140
What the queer community can do.

590
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,860
What our online communities can do to support

591
00:28:40,860 --> 00:28:41,380
us.

592
00:28:42,100 --> 00:28:48,300
And how you can stop masking.

593
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:51,800
Because the other part of radical acceptance is

594
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:55,140
accepting yourself exactly how you are.

595
00:28:55,900 --> 00:28:56,820
And who knows?

596
00:28:56,940 --> 00:28:58,420
I might even share another story.

597
00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:01,560
Thank you so much for being here.

598
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:02,940
Thank you so much for listening.

599
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:05,200
If you are a member of the queer

600
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:06,860
community, I want to wish you the happiest

601
00:29:06,860 --> 00:29:08,400
and most joyful pride.

602
00:29:08,940 --> 00:29:10,060
I am with you.

603
00:29:10,180 --> 00:29:11,680
I am celebrating with you.

604
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:16,320
And if you're in my neurodivergent community, I

605
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:18,760
would love to invite you to my neurodivergent

606
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:19,580
grief circles.

607
00:29:19,940 --> 00:29:21,660
They happen once a month.

608
00:29:21,780 --> 00:29:24,820
You can go to feathermanesoul.com slash events

609
00:29:24,820 --> 00:29:28,220
and find out when the next one is

610
00:29:28,220 --> 00:29:29,140
and sign up.

611
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:30,940
I would love to have you join me.

612
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:32,640
Thank you so much.

613
00:29:32,900 --> 00:29:34,380
Don't forget to like and subscribe.

614
00:29:34,660 --> 00:29:35,680
Until next week.

615
00:29:36,380 --> 00:29:39,040
You've been listening to the Feathermane Soul Wisdom

616
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,400
Podcast hosted by Kit Kaelstow.

617
00:29:41,780 --> 00:29:45,380
Learn more about feathermanesoul at feathermanesoul.com.

618
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,540
As a wild spirit storyteller, Kit is passionate

619
00:29:48,540 --> 00:29:52,740
about helping those who are neurodivergent, disabled, or

620
00:29:52,740 --> 00:29:55,660
living with chronic illness rediscover their own inner

621
00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:56,540
wild spirit.

622
00:29:57,100 --> 00:29:58,980
Visit feathermanesoul.com.